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David Coats Brighton Blog - July 2006 Archive

July 6th - happy birthday dear needananswer!

I nearly forgot! Today is this fantastic website's 1st birthday...ish. I actually bought the domain about 2 &1frac2; years ago, but it remained idle until 6th July 2005, when I decided it was time to catalogue my life.

Well, what a couple of weeks its been. So much turbulence. So much change. Rachel and I are still no more (boohoo), but I got a promotion at work (yippee!) which I started on Friday. I have been travelling the country in search of fun, meeting up with friends - and family, all the time on an emotional rollercoaster between emptiness, loneliness, happiness and hope. I feel great today - in fact have done for a few days now. I'm really positive about a Rachelless future. SO I've lost the person I care most about in the world...So what! I've got plenty of love to give...There's plenty of others who want my love. Bad luck Rachel...You're missing out big time. I'm great! Your loss!!!

So how have I gone from the state I was 3 weeks ago to this? Well...10 ways to get over a broken heart:

  1. Get a promotion and pay rise!
  2. Go to Edinburgh for a big piss up
  3. Go to a strip club and let fit girls drool all over you (Pretend its real and whatever you do - DON'T compare them to your ex!)
  4. Go to Southampton to a classy bar and chat up fit women
  5. Go to Southampton to a dirty nightclub and ogle at filthy birds!
  6. Lift heavy weights and fight a punchbag - it can take the pain!
  7. Go out with your mates, drink lots of beer and watch lots of football (but don't support England!)
  8. Go to an all night House club in Kings Cross
  9. Move your flat around so computer and Hifi take center stage
  10. Cook a fancy meal for female friends you haven't seen for ages!

So the last one is what i'm doing tonight. Jane and Naomi are coming round for a nice meal and chat with plenty of wine I hope. Here's to a rosy future of single fun!

July 10th - Weekend of fun part 3 - Bournemouth!

So another weekend, and another trip off somewhere fun! Over the last month I've been to Bath, Southampton, London and Edinburgh. This weekend it was the turn of Bournemouth to welcome Dave for heavy drinking and bad behaviour! But I haven't finished with Brighton just yet...

After work on Friday we went for our usual Friday evening drinks at the Suga Qube opposite the office. I wasn't planning a heavy one as I planned to be up as early as possible on Saturday to get to Bournemouth in time for the pubs opening. This was my first mistake. Kidding myself I was going to get out of bed at 8am on a Saturday! After some convincing by Claire and Lucy, and 4 pints racing around my bloodstream, I decided to stay out - at least until 11. We headed off to the Victory, then HaHa where my weakness for being easily led got the better of me and Jonny duly forced me to go to the Zap to see James Lavelle, using his gentle persuasive manner and by stealing my bag!

I haven't been to the Zap since it was last called The Zap! It's very different since it became Union and back to The Zap again - The bar has moved, the DJ is at hand-shake hight and the Air Conditioning works!! The night was quality breakbeat and House - which i'm really loving at the moment. The resident DJ J-Me was absolutley fantastic. He dropped some classic tunes, remixed with a modern breakbeat style beat, as well as some of the latest wicked tunes - and scratched like a genius. I rarely hear scratching over House which is such a shame - scratching is true DJ'ing in my opinion! The current tunes remind me of when I first got into Garage back in 97. I loved the tunes but didn't know any of the names. Its been so long since I had some extended clubbing experience so its all new again - which is great! At about 3am I decided to call it a day and drunkenly cycled home for some shut eye.

Later that morning, about 11am, 3 hours later than planned, I arose bleary eyed and headed off to Bournemouth to start the days drinking - again! Tim's brother owns a flat there but has gone to Kos - so 6 of the lads from Home made the journey from Bath for a dirty Saturday night out. Our first stop was the lovely sandy beach. I've almost forgotten what a sandy beach is like and have argued long and hard that pebbles are much better - but being able to run around barefoot and jump about is so good, I wish Brighton was sandy! It started to get a little chilly so we headed back to the flat to start the drinking.

A bottle of Sailor Jerry and some dirty Vodka down the hatch, we headed back into town at about 9 to sample Bournemouth night life. Now I'm used to Stag and Hen nights in Brighton. I always thought Brighton was one of the Stag night capitals of the UK - well - Bournemouth is most certainly the Hen party capital of the UK! There were litterally hundereds of Hen parties - each with their own ti-shirts, bunny ears, fox ears or nurse outfits - paradise! We started off at Bar Med - which is so much nicer than the other Bar Med's i've been in. We followed this up with a bar called Toko which would eventually be our bar/club of choice for the evening. Its a really cool bar with big fish tanks everywhere and a dance floor downstairs. Best of all it was absolutley heaving with beautiful women, was free to get in and open until 6am! After dancing suductively with someones bride-to-be, and Moley doing his now trademarked boxers-off-without-taking-trousers-off trick, we headed round the corner to Bliss - which was pretty much the same bar as Toko! We met another Hen party who gave us all prizes for biggest biceps, nicest eyes and most drunk bloke, before going to Elements. Oh Dear!

This was our biggest mistake. Elements is similar to Creation in Brighton - but much much dirtier. There were just the most horrible people in there dancing to the worst cheese you've ever heard. The place stank of sick and your feet stuck to the filthy carpet. My lasting impression will be the 40 year old women, tarted up like a 16 year old, soaked in sweat trying it on with each of us in turn. Disgusting! Moley, Amit and I left less than ½ an hour after paying the £12 entry fee and headed back to Toko for some quality House tunes, very similar to that of the night before. At around 4.30am we headed to the Chicken shop for some spicy wings and our night was complete!

Bournemouth was very cool - I highly recommend it! Loads of women, good clubs and a quality beach. Where to next weekend then? Week 4 of freedom and I've got no plans (Adz - Hastings?). Invitations anyone?

July 20th - Character Building

During my time working in the railway station in Bath, I experienced some aspects of working life I hoped I would never experience. Days when we were short staffed and I had to work a 12 hour shift - sometimes alone - with a queue of 20 people huffing and puffing - with the trains being delayed and cancelled because of a fatality or bridge strike were a real strain on the brain. They would leave me thinking 'whats the point?' - 'why do I do this?' My Boss, Ian Monks, used to say - "Dave - it's character building!" I used to think - 'I've got enough character thanks - How's this going to build it any more?'

Last night I met Rachel for the last time

It was very clinical and very final. I don't know what I was expecting really. I guess I knew in my heart that she wasn't going to want us again, but I held onto some hope that she wanted to talk about how we can mend things and try to make us work. She didn't. She finally told me why she left. She simply doesn't love me any more. I don't know how or why she has stopped loving me, It doesn't make sense in my head how you can just stop loving someone. I do know however, that it is over. Full stop. Closure at last. I can finally move on and stop thinking about us. I can let go of all the niggling thoughts telling me don't let go, don't give up. I can finally end my grieving for our life together and the love I have lost and start a fresh.

It's all part of Character Building - Those days in the station which were shit, and made me think 'why am i putting myself through this', well its similar now. Why do we put ourselves through the mill of a relationship? What was the point? It's all character building. I now know how to love, how to treat a girl. I know what it is like to live with the woman you love - and I know what its like to get hurt. It's all an addition to my character - to my life experience. I wonder what I can take from this - It's certainly not going to put me off women - or off another relationship. I'm sure given time the value of this experience will become apparent, but for now its hard to think of the positives. She obviously wasn't the right girl for me, and in the end, someone else who won't just stop loving me will come along.

So this is it. Rachel ends here. Thanks to all of you who have written, texted or called me to ask after me and send your love - Lottie in Australia, Regi in Brazil, Alf in Gran Canaria, Dan in London, The Boys in Bath. Thanks to all of you who have put up with my moping and mood swings and my constant chatter about my shit life. Thanks to you for putting up with my emotional outbursts on this site. It all stops here. The last time I mention her or my old life is now.

So where is my life headed now? My Mum actually said one of the few sensible and prolific things to me last night which is 'live for today - not for the future'. I guess I've always looked to the future. I've always planned money, living, work, my career path, but more importantly my life with women - where the next is going to come from, and when they are there - where we are going. Planning for the future. But why? OK - it is important to be careful with money, and excel in your job to further your life, but when it comes to relationships with other people - live for the moment. What is it I learnt in English lessons at School - "The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry"? I'm going to start living for the moment. Plan only as far as the next weekend. I need to remove this need for a relationship, this constant search for the right person, and concentrate on having fun and enjoying life.

I live in Brighton. I think this city is the greatest city to live in in the United Kingdom. Possibly one of the best in the world. There is of course one of the coolest beaches in the country - with a strip of bars, clubs, restaurants and shops. There are lovely parks and green spaces. WE are surrounded by the beautiful rolling hills of the south downs to the north and the white chalk cliffs to the east. I am privilaged to have some of the liveliest nightlife to be found anywhere outside Ibiza on my doorstep. It's not to big to be hard to bump into a friend on the street, and not too small to find it hard to find a 24 hour shop. I have some great friends here, a great job, I cycle to work everyday along the seafront. London is a mere hour away and the rest of the country - in fact the world is my oyster! Addam is going to move into the beautiful flat that I own. We're going to get Sky Sports! We're going to work hard and play hard. We're going to relax when we want, get pissed when we want, pull a bird when we're lucky! I'm going to excel at work - stay focused and enjoy myself. Working for one of the best and fastest growing Search engine optimisation companies in the country, I am going to do well - and going to have fun working with great people!

So here's to a new life. A new positive David. Here's to living for the moment, and living for myself. Welcome back freedom. Anyone wants me, I'll be in the pub :-)

July 21st - Funniest Domain name ever!

Quick post before I go to Bath this weekend. Is this not the funniest domain name in the world ever! Why would you register a name like that for a legitimate business? The funniest thing which has had me in stitches all morning is that they are based in a place called Cockermouth!

A bit late - I am absolutely loving the Arctic Monkeys at the moment. Originally, I thought the biggest selling band in the UK ever were complete wank - simply because the lead singer has a fag hanging out of his mouth on the album cover and all the posters for the album - think of the children! Much more powerful than any abstract silk cut billboard poster ever was. Now I have got past that and the music is wicked!!

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